Let’s see how fast I can get through the results show.

Starting the clock at 3:52pm, EDT.

Fast-forwarding through the meeting of the judges, and a snippet about Jordin Sparks. Stop for a moment to check out the group medley: ugh. Continue fast-forwarding. Commercials, then a stop for the package about the iTunes recording sessions. Meh, blah, onward.

FF through the recap of last night, and here’s the moments of truth. Chikezie is out first, and is in the bottom three. Brooke’s out next. I can FF, since she’s safe. Likewise Carly. Commercials, with a quick stop to see what song they’re doing for the Ford music video. Ah, “I Want You to Want Me”. Classic.

Back to more results. David A., safe. Syesha, stools. Michael, safe. FF through all. More commercials, then the stupid questions section, then a package about Kimberley Locke. She sings, then more commercials, then a package about Idol Gives Back.

More results. Ramiele I’ll watch. She’s safe, WHAT? That leaves us Kristy and Jason. Of course, KLC and her jingoism are safe, putting Jason on the stools.

The bottom three head center stage. First one safe? Jason. It’s down to Chikezie and Syesha, and it darned well better be Chikezie going home. Commercials, judges’ comments, and … highest vote of this season has Syesha safe, with Chik going home. Goodbye package, sing-out, and … DONE! 4:00pm even. Eight minutes. I can do better next time.

I watched Dancing with the Stars until 9:00 so I could do AI commercial-free. Steve Guttenberg looks like he’s having the best time EVER. Why can’t they all love doing the show like he does?

It’s the top 10, singing songs from the year they were born. I can’t wait for some of these to make me feel old. I know what some of the songs are going to be already, and I’m looking forward to a couple of them. If you’ll remember my prediction from week 3′s 80s songs, you’ll know how tickled I am.

We meet the judges, then we meet the kids, who pour awkwardly out of the big doors at the rear of the stage. Then we get right to the singing. Awesome!

Ramiele Mulabay: 1987. She had awesome hair as a baby. And she used to bite other kids. Karaoke was big when she was a toddler. She’s doing Heart’s “Alone”, and she’s wearing 1987-appropriate high-waisted shorts and an off-the-shoulder tank top. She starts all soft and low, and it’s all right. Then she gets to the chorus, which should be powerful. She’s painfully off-key through most of it. She finally almost hits the big big note, then goes back to a ballady bit at the very end. Randy notes that she’s “a little bit under the weather, like me” but doesn’t forgive her pitchiness. Paula (and what the HELL is she wearing?) sounds like she has a bad cold too, and gives Ramiele points for bravery. Simon doesn’t think it was as bad as Randy said — the first part was not bad. He points out that she survived last week, having done a crappy job, so this week she’s golden.

Jason Castro: 1987. He’s an Aries (in fact, his birthday is today) so no wonder I like him. He was, according to pictures, a big fat baby with huge blue eyes. He’ll be doing Sting’s “Fragile”, which is a song I absolutely LOVE. Please be good. Please. Please. Hmm. He’s playing the acoustic guitar as usual. He’s hitting the notes well, but the tempo is faster than the original, and it’s like he’s not understanding the meaning of the lyrics. He then switches to Spanish (Nada Como el Sol FTW) and it ends well. Randy likes it but thought it wasn’t a big enough chance. Paula likes it and agrees that he played it safe. Simon tells him he’s had two bad weeks, and he needs to take it more seriously. He compares the performance to busking, and I can actually somewhat agree. Happy birthday, kiddo.

Syesha Mercado: 1987 again. She was a big crybaby. (And she does the creepy baby cry again.) She did dance team in school. She’s doing a song called “If I Were Your Woman”, which doesn’t sound familiar to me — amazing, since I was glued to the freakin’ radio in 1987. Google tells me it was done by Stephanie Mills. I don’t recognize it at all. Clearly it didn’t get play on KPLZ or KUBE back then. From the music playing behind it, it sounds like she was on-key. Randy thinks it’s the best he’s ever heard her sing. Paula (and what the HELL did she do with her hair?) says this is the moment that’ll go down in history as the time when Syesha flipped the competition over in her favor. Simon rates it as the best so far (but we’re only three in) and says it wasn’t as good as Randy thought.

Chikezie: 1985 (September 11, poor kid). Time for the interview stool! Seacrest wants to talk about song selection, and Chikezie calls it “kinda crazy”. He took the advice of Ricky and the band, and followed his heart to his song choice. His package includes family photos in front of the Disneyland “It’s a Small World” facade. Awesome. He’s singing “If Only for One Night”, a duet from Patti LaBelle and Luther Vandross. Again, not the stuff I was listening to in 1985 — I was grooving to “Take on Me” and “Careless Whisper” and the like. He sounds all right — the song sounds very much like an R&B song from the 1980s. Randy comments that Chikezie didn’t make it feel young, like Syesha did (my point exactly). Paula disagrees, and tells him that he did a great job. Simon thought it was done well, but that the performance was cheesy.

Brooke White: 1983. She taught herself to play piano by ear. Her parents look very young. And she’s taking on “Every Breath You Take”. She starts singing two words, then as she goes to start in on the piano, she realizes how off-key she is, so she starts over. With the lilting piano underneath, she makes it sound like a sweet little song, and not stalkerish at all. The “mosh pit” kids are waving their hands back and forth. It’s all right, but very weird and uplifting and cheery, when the song just shouldn’t be. Randy calls her choice “interesting”, but didn’t like the arrangement for the back half. Paula clutches her hands (and what the HELL are those fingerless opera gloves?) and tells her it’s better than last week; she also praises Brooke’s consistency. Simon agrees with Randy, but says it’s definitely good enough to keep her for another week.

Michael Johns: 1978. (Good, I don’t feel quite as old now.) His parents seem charming and well-adjusted. Seacrest introduces him by saying, “Two Queen classics for the price of one.” Hmm. He starts out with “We Will Rock You”, which isn’t entirely on-pitch. Then he moves to “We Are the Champions”, which is better. Although he doesn’t do the high note on “fighting”. Overall it’s decent, and completely typical of what we’ve come to expect from him. Randy has to wait for the screaming of girls to stop (which has Barbarella saying in my head, “What’s that screaming? A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.”), then tells him it’s his best performance on the show so far. Paula believes it’s the perfect song for him. Simon says it’s the first time he’s seen star potential in Michael.

Carly Smithson: 1983. This is the song I’ve been waiting for. She’s a Virgo, blah blah, named after Carly Simon, blah blah, she had an amazing afro as a child, blah blah. Get to the “Total Eclipse of the Heart” already! And not the Dan Band version. Here we go … turn around! For the first two lines, she’s slightly flat. The background singer doing the “turn around”s is better. And apparently we’re “living like a power keg”. She’s better on the parts where she can shout; otherwise it’s very karaoke for me. Randy was so-so on it. Paula doesn’t get where Randy is coming from; she doesn’t like the original song apparently, but Carly made it good. Simon feels that “something didn’t quite work”, probably because Carly was very tense.

David Archuleta: 1990. He’s on the stool. He’s schooling here in LA, because he’s missing school back home (he’s missed some dances, and might miss prom). He’s singing “You’re the Voice”, a song from some nobody in 1985 that was covered by David Foster in 1990. It’s another song I don’t know — in 1990, I was listening to other stuff. He’s good, I guess, but it’s a little too heartwarming and Xtian-like for me. Randy agrees that it was a strange choice, but gives him props for his singing. Paula didn’t know the song either, but Simon knows the name of the 1985 nobody. He didn’t like the performance, and found it reminiscent of a “theme park performance”. And now that I sing in a theme park, I have to say — Simon clearly hasn’t seen a show in a theme park ever. But whatevs.

Kristy Lee Cook: 1984 (born in Seattle). She was a loud little kid, blah blah. Is it any surprise that she’s taking on “God Bless the USA” with her fake country twang? Sweet merciful heaven, a terrible song by a terrible singer. This should be a hot mess. The lyrics are incredibly trite, but she’s hitting most of her notes. And she’s toned down the twang a little bit. Oh, there’s a key change that doesn’t go well. She’s just so damn boring! Randy applauds her song choice. Paula says it’s a “poignant and respectful song” (what the HELL was she listening to?) but tells her to watch her pitch. Simon calls it her best performance by a mile, and tells her it was a very clever song choice. Hmph.

David Cook: 1982. He thinks as a kid he had a massive skull, and looked like a supervillain from Marvel comics or something (um, David, I think you mean a Talosian). No wonder he does the comb-forward — he has an enormous forehead. He probably isn’t balding as much as we thought; he just has a huge freak head. He’s doing the Chris Cornell version of “Billie Jean”. Yes, it’s a modern version of an 80s classic — but it’s because someone else did a modern arrangement of it. I hope he doesn’t get any points for modernizing it. He does really well with it, though — he sounds great, and he’s commercially viable right now. Randy tells him he might be the one to win the whole thing. Paula is blown away and can’t sit down. Simon calls him brave, and calls the performance amazing. Nobody comes out and specifically compliments “his” arrangement, but still, the feeling is there.

Recaps: Ramiele was flat. Jason was quick and casual. Syesha threw some power into it. Chikezie was 20 years out of sync. Brooke was Brooke. Michael proved that he should be a contestant on Rock Star: Queen. Carly was unremarkable. David was all, “yay.” Kristy was a tacky America zealot. David was good as usual.

Bottom three time. Definitely Ramiele. The other two are tough — amazingly, I don’t think Kristy will be in the B3 this week — she sucked up to America perfectly. I’m going to go with Chikezie because he was boring and outdated, and … ugh, I hate to do it, but I’m going to chance it and say Jason. It did feel too casual and phoned-in today. I have to go with Ramiele for elimination — she was definitely the worst this week.

Time is totally the key to sour flavor.

6:00pm – mix dough, leave for work
2:00am – get home from work, punch down dough, go to bed
10:00am – get up, punch down dough, knead, form loaves
2:00pm – bake!

Yep, the dough sat and rose/fermented for a whopping 16 hours. But for all that time, I barely had to pay attention to it. And I didn’t worry about temperature — the dough rose at room temp, which ranged from 72° to 77° through the night.

The loaves were flattish, but they definitely have a sour flavor. And the pattern of bubbles is very much like a store-bought sourdough. I got a crisper crust by putting a pan of water in the oven and baking for a shorter time at a higher temperature.

Now that I sort of know what I’m doing, the tinkering begins. Adjustments in time, temperature and treatment lie ahead. Bread, ho!

Oh man, this show is going to be great. Lots of filler, and Kellie Pickler too!

Seacrest introduces the judges, then goes on to let us know about this year’s mentors. I thought they weren’t doing mentors this year, but clearly I was mistaken. The list is: Dolly Parton (oh yay, a country week), Mariah Carey, Andrew Lloyd Webber, and Neil Diamond.

Now let’s hear about the songwriting competition. Last year, 25,000 songs were submitted. We hear more facts, but I’m mostly distracted by a long, lingering shot of my buddy Ethan standing and applauding (I think it was one of the finale nights — Jerry Springer and Jeff Foxworthy are standing behind him). The winning song was a hunk of crap called “This Is My Now”, and it’s on Jordin Sparks’ album, which has now been certified gold. Wow, not doing that well, is it? Anyhoo, songs are accepted until March 31st. Hmm — could we possibly cobble together some craptacular and heartwarming lyrics before then?

Time again for the kids to sing a medley of Beatles songs. The boys tackle “While My Guitar Gently Weeps”, then we cut to the girls and “Here, There and Everywhere”. I hope you folks on the west coast got to see the cameraman stumble as the shot rolled in on Kristy. And it sounded like Ramiele’s microphone wasn’t working. They all segue into “Because”, then into “The End”. Whew.

We recap the top 11′s performances: Amanda thrashed her head around, David Cook was pretty good, Michael was totally emo, Carly compared “Blackbird” to the record industry, Jason was goofy and awkward, Syesha got all serious, Kristy removed the challenging notes from her song and was blander than paste, Brooke was utterly predictable, Chikezie blew his harmonica (and his song), Ramiele was limp and flaccid, and David Archuleta got his groove back.

Results time! We’re apparently going to call the kids from backstage one by one, and send them either to the comfy blue couch or the silver stools of death. I had no idea that this was a big deal elimination night, but Seacrest lets us know that the top 10 are the ones who get to go on tour. Ah. Brooke is first, and she’s totally safe. Next up is Carly, and surprisingly, she’s sent over to the silver stools. Many are the boos, and the judges feel that America totally got it wrong.

Next out is David Archuleta, accompanied by screaming girls. He’s totally top 10, and heads over to comfyville. Michael Johns follows, and also gets to go sit on the couches. We head off to commercial with a third of the results done, and Carly sitting alone on the stools of death.

Back from commercials, we get a featurette about how the Ford videos are made. Oy, the cheese. Back to the results, we see David Cook come out, and his hair is worse than usual. But he still gets to go sit on the sofas. Next is Kristy, and if she’s not in the bottom three, I know we all will feel the injustice. But she is, and Kristy joins Carly on the stools. Next out is Jason Castro, and he’s totally safe. And then tiny Ramiele comes out, and she cries her way over to the couches as part of the top 10. We’ll find out our last bottom-dweller after the break.

But before we get to the last of the results, we have the inane questions from viewers. Cheryl Ann asks why Simon spends money on cars, but not on clothes. Jessica wants to know if Paula and Simon will ever do a sequel to the “kiss skit”. Simon says yes, and tells Paula that she’s actually a very good kisser. Mary asks Ramiele about the last song she downloaded on her iPod — it’s R. Kelly’s “I’m a Flirt”. Linda wants to know if Michael’s experience on AI has been everything he thought it would be. Oy vey.

It’s Pickler time! We get a package about her tour, and how her life has changed since being on Idol, and she’s clearly purchased a new rack. She’s also still a big ol’ idiot. She comes out to sing “Red High Heels”, and I can only handle a little bit before I have to fast-forward through the rest.

More commercials, then a package about Idol Gives Back, and then we’re back to results. There are three Idols left — Syesha, Chikezie and Amanda. First out from backstage is Syesha, and she gets to spend a week out of the bottom — it’s off to the couches for her. That leaves us Amanda and Chikezie. Cheesy Chikezie is safe, and Amanda heads over to the bottom three.

Even more more more commercials, then the bottom three ladies hold each other center stage. Carly is named first, and is sent back to the couches. It’s down to Kristy and Amanda. And then shock of all shocks, Kristy is safe again — Amanda will be going home. This was definitely the wrong decision — Kristy shouldn’t be going on tour. She just sucks.

Wait, what? Last week was “the Lennon/McCartney songbook”, and they avoided saying the word “Beatles” at all costs … and this week’s theme is “The Beatles”? Color me confused from the start. But hey, more good Beatles music.

Cue the most awkward contestant introductions EVER. The kids file down stairs on either side of the stage, and none of them really seems to know where to look, or where to stand. Seacrest then sends them away, and goes to introduce the judges just in time to catch Randy yawning. Dawg!

Ah, apparently last week was so awesome and well-received, this is the first time they’ve “expanded on a theme”. Seacrest and the judges babble for what feels like fifteen minutes, then it’s time for a package about The Beatles. Yes, they were fabulous. Blah blah blah fishcakes. On with the singings!

Amanda Overmyer: She relates her “most memorable moment this far”, which I’m guessing is the theme for their packages. For her, it’s being on the big stage. Tonight she’ll be doing “Back in the U.S.S.R.”, and in her package she just seems really tired. She switches up some notes, but it’s not as wildly different a version as I think she thinks it is. On the plus side, she does appear to be having a little more fun than in previous weeks. Randy gives her a seven out of ten, Paula says she was ahead of the beat, and Simon calls it a predictable mess. The discussion leads to the point where she makes the claim, “Ballads are boring.” For shame, girlie. I like her less each week.

Kristy Lee Cook: She starts on the interview stool with what looks like a diary made out of a stuffed animal in her hand. Oh, she has little photo albums to remind her of home. Memorable for her is constantly being in the bottom two. She’s going to do “You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away”, although she only picked it from the name (which is how I pick horses at the racetrack). She heard it for the first time today. She starts off-key, giving us a boring and flat rendition of the song. She also substitutes walking and hand waving for personality. Good lord, she looks like a singing mannequin. Although you’d think a mannequin would be on-key. Randy was iffy about it (but no number on the ten-scale is given), Paula tells her she’s never looked better, and Simon tells her she needs hypnosis to become a decent performer. He calls her “musical wallpaper”. APT!

David Archuleta: Memorable moments: singing “Imagine” and forgetting his words. He’s doing “The Long and Winding Road”, which is on my list of great Beatles songs. He’s a million times better than last week, although it’s not the most exciting performance. What a lovely voice, though. Randy loves it, but wants more runs and changes. Paula commends his purity of sound. Simon calls it amazing. He gets a little bit of weepy face, and you have to wonder how incredible it would be to stand there, all of 16 years old, and have Simon Cowell tell you that you’re amazing.

Kellie Pickler will perform at the results show tomorrow. Oh, sweet mother of pearl.

Michael Johns: Remembers Hollywood week, when he sang “Bohemian Rhapsody”. Tonight he’ll be singing “A Day in the Life”, and it’ll be intriguing to see how he compresses it. It’s an average hack job, and he clearly forgets a few lyrics right near the end. He sounds good, as usual, but it wasn’t great. Randy doesn’t think it was one of his good ones, Paula thinks he lost his connection to the audience because he’s wearing ear monitors, and Simon calls it a mess (hot mess, tranny, fierce!) and tells Michael that he has to sort himself out. Michael dedicates the song to a dead friend, and it’s revealed that he actually wasn’t wearing monitors. Oh SNAPS, Paula Abdul!

Brooke White: She gets the interview stool treatment; she got to visit home on Saturday and meet her new niece. In her package, it’s vaguely implied that “Let It Be” was her memorable moment. Tonight she’s going to tackle “Here Comes the Sun”, which is another great song IMHO. She starts out sitting on the stairs, then sashays her way over to center stage. She does a good job, and just looks like she’s having a mellow, enjoyable time. Randy thinks it was awkward, Paula thinks that Brooke makes her heart smile, and Simon predicted her yellow dress and thought it was terrible. To Simon it was “wet and forgettable”. Wet? She’s adorably sheepish about the criticism, and oddly, it doesn’t fill me with rage.

David Cook: His memorable moment is last Tuesday, with the “rock concert feel”. This week he’ll be doing “Day Tripper”, based on a Whitesnake version from the 70s. He’s out there with his big white “AC” guitar, rocking away, and I can’t help but notice that he has a second microphone with clear plastic tubing attached to it. I have to wonder if he’s going to go all Frampton vocoder on us. AND OH, HE DOES! All of the kids in the audience are probably, “What the hell is that?” DAVID COOK COMES ALIVE! Randy doesn’t know if it was his best, but it was solid. Paula believes he’s ready to go sell records, and he’ll move on to Geico commercials next. (What?) Simon doesn’t think it was as good as David thought it was, and found the vocoder (which both Paula and Randy called “the voice box”) was stupid. Seacrest hems and haws before giving the numbers, and he totally should have played with the vocoder.

Carly Smithson: Another memorable moment from last week — the comparison to Kelly Clarkson. Tonight she’ll be singing “Blackbird”, another of my favorites, and it’ll be nice to see her do something softer. Hmm. She’s singing in too low a key, and she’s wearing some distracting granny frock. I guess it’s OK, and it cooks a little bit at the end, but I’d rather listen to Sarah McLachlan’s version from the I am Sam soundtrack. Randy loves it, Paula loves it, Simon doesn’t think it was a smart choice, and found the song indulgent. Carly goes on to parse the lyrics and compare it to the music industry beating you down and selling less than a thousand copies of your album under another name on your multi-million dollar contract.

Jason Castro: His most memorable moment was singing “Hallelujah”, and singing the last note poorly. Tonight he’s singing “Michelle”, a song I know all too well (and don’t really love that much). Watching his package, he’d fit right in with the bakers on Ace of Cakes. He’s standing there with a shirt tucked into jeans, and from the neck down, he could be any fiftysomething wearing his weekend dad jeans. He flails like Brooke did — without their instruments, they’re lost. It’s all right, but far from his best work. Randy is iffy about it, Paula calls him charming and then accurately pegs that he gets uncomfortable when away from his guitar, and Simon comments on how weird the show is tonight. He regrets doing The Beatles again, when last week was so great.

Syesha Mercado: Finally, someone will tackle “Yesterday”. Syesha starts out on the interview stool, and we get to hear that this is the first week that her mom and dad could come to the show. Her memorable moment could have been losing her voice in Hollywood, but it’s actually being in the bottom three last week — it’s the kick in the pants she needed. She starts out on a stool (although with her long dress covering it, it’s like she’s a magician’s assistant hovering in a sitting position) accompanied by one dude on a guitar. She’s SO much better this week than last, and does good with a ballad — changing up the intensity here and there. Randy loves it, Paula loves it and loves the vulnerability she showed this week, and Simon thought it was her best performance so far.

Chikezie: His memorable moment was the first round of Hollywood, when he first got compliments from all three judges. Tonight he’s doing “I’ve Just Seen a Face”, which is a title I don’t recognize (though I’m sure I’ll know the song). He’s back to being Smoove B. tonight, and finally at the chorus I recognize the song. He plays a little harmonica (poorly), then his song goes from sensual to countryfied. What the heck? This guy is a secret bluegrass fan or something, and it’s when he goes that way that he gets good. Randy finds the change-up strange, but Paula loves that he’s showing so much depth and variety. Simon says it started OK, then the harmonica was atrocious, then it turned into “Achy Breaky Heart” at the end.

Once again, there’s a songwriting contest for the finale songs. Noted.

Ramiele Mulabay: I couldn’t think of who was left. That doesn’t bode well. She loves how everyone is like a big family away from home. Tonight she’s doing “I Should Have Known Better” (which makes me think of Richard Marx, not The Beatles). She’s just a’ight — the whole number has the sound of a good singer performing way outside their preferred genre. But I predict Paula will love her outfit — it’s the kind of thing Paula would have worn in 1985. Randy says he wasn’t jumping up and down, but he liked it — happy-go-lucky, but a’ight. Paula says it was better than last week, and that there’s something about her voice when she sings ballads (agreed). Simon comments that it sounded like Chikezie was on harmonica. Also, that it sounded amateurish and was a mediocre song choice.

Whoa, recaps. If I recall correctly, there were a lot of mediocre performances, but not a lot that stood out as utterly godawful. Amanda was so-so. Kristy was personality-free. David was better than last week, but not awesome. Michael did all right, but forgot some words. Brooke was an adorable spaz. David got all Frampton on our asses. Carly didn’t live up to her song’s greatness. Jason was adorable of face and poorly dressed. Syesha was surprisingly good. Chikezie was a secret jug band member. Ramiele was out of her zone.

I have a feeling we’re going to be all over the place this week. I can only go with who I liked the least. Of course, Kristy is a permanent member of my bottom three. Joining her will be … oh, let’s say Ramiele for mediocrity, and Amanda because her attitude is pissing me off lately. And my pick for elimination, once again, has to be Kristy.

The sourdough bread is made, and the sourdough bread has been tasted. It’s definitely more sour than the first time, although it’s still a relatively mild flavor. I used some science to change what I did.

First off, take a look at my starter. It’s still doing beautifully — I fed it last night before going to bed, and marked the level. You can see that overnight it rose to over double the size, leaving behind a high-tide line. By this morning, it was back down (but still higher than the start point, due to the gases inside).

I had Scott mix the sponge for me around 8pm, since I was at work at the time. I wanted to try an overnight rise, so when I got home at 10:30pm, I made the dough. It’s a pretty firm dough, and got hard to knead really fast. It’s shiny because I rubbed oil on the outside of the dough ball to keep it flexible.

It grew huge overnight, and I punched it down around 6:30am. Then I blearily staggered back to bed. This is the second rise in the bowl.

In order to develop more sour flavor, I wanted to do a long rise at a cooler temperature. But the fridge is TOO cool — I wanted something around 65°. Which is difficult to find in an apartment in Florida. So I tried to make the oven into a cool box — I put a bowl full of ice water in there (on top of a towel on a pan, to collect condensation) and kept the door closed. It worked! By 1am, when I went to bed, it’d dropped from 75° to 66°; and at 6:30am, it was a nice 64°.

At 10:30am, I was up for the day and ready to go. I punched the dough down a second time, then kneaded it some and cut it into thirds, forming three loaves. I covered them with a damp kitchen towel and let them sit on the stovetop for a few hours.

Around 2pm, the loaves had risen beautifully, and the dough didn’t spring back readily when I poked it. Ready to bake! (The hidden Mickey is purely unintentional, and not terribly hidden.)

And here’s the bread. It’s got a nice crunchy crust on the top, while the inside (the “crumb”) is soft and lovely. And you can definitely taste the sourdough, though it’s mild. Much to think about for the next time — an even longer rise could result in more of the bacteria living and dying, thus making it more sour. I’ll have to read up more on the internets.

And in non-bread news, we got a new set of glasses at IKEA this weekend. Swanky!

It’s the first elimination of the finals, and I predict a lot of filler.

The show begins with a lot of blah-blah, including some horrifying stuff with Jim Carrey and his incredibly phony smile, then a group sing of some items from “the Lennon/McCartney Songbook”. Can’t we just say “Beatles songs”? I guess we’re contractually not allowed. It’s terrible, as all group songs are.

We get a recap of last night’s performances, and it’s all much as we remember. Then it’s time for some bottom-three action. Seacrest has four people stand up: Carly, Michael, Jason and Syesha. Looks like it’s going to be Syesha in the bottom three, from this group. And indeed it is. She gets to sing her song again, which is good as far as filler goes, but not so good since it’s one of America’s three least favorite performances. Paula stands and dances, so that’s something, anyway.

As usual, we have a Ford commercial by the Idols — some song called “The Distance”, and it’s a terrible rap-but-not-quite thing with no melody. The commercial itself is I guess a political parody, although it’s not parodying anything specific.

Before more results, we get to see a package about the Idols helping people and blah blah blah. It’s accompanied by a cover tune from the L/McC songbook. Then Seacrest has four more Idols stand: Chikezie, Amanda, David Cook, and Kristy. Oooh, looks like Kristy. Chikezie is told to sit back down, as is Amanda, as is David. Then, it’s no surprise — Kristy is told to grab the microphone to sing. Oh dear lord, we have to hear this song again? I’m making Scott listen to it, it’s so awful. Oh, but Sanjaya is up on his feet, clapping, out in the audience. Appropriate!

Here’s a new thing — live callers with questions. Intriguing, and a decent method of filler. And here’s more filler — David Foster on piano, with Katherine McPhee, performing “Something” (which is apparently part of the George Harrison songbook). McPhee seems to have gone through the same zombification as Kelly Clarkson — overly made-up, poorly dressed, and a bit glassy-eyed. It’s a decent performance; certainly the best singing we’re bound to hear on this stage tonight.

Back to eliminations! But oh no, Jim Carrey has joined us on the couch. Sweet merciful heavens, MAKE HIM STOP. Onward — the last four contestants are called up to join Ryan: David A., David H., Brooke and Ramiele. First back to the couches is little David Archuleta. Good, because I’ll forgive him this one week. Next up is Brooke, who is of course safe. Then it’s down to David H. and Ramiele, both bottom-three choices amongst all of us. Ramiele is safe, which means it’s David H. in the bottom three.

David sings, then we get a classic Seacrest fakeout — we’ll send one of the final three back to the couches … … … after the break. Nice. After the break, we find out that Paula has never seen a “more stronger” bottom three. But the judges believe that America got it right. The first person sent back to the couches is Syesha. It’s down to Kristy and David, with Kristy (shockingly) safe. David Hernandez will be the one going home, bringing us down to a two-David competition.

We get the David montage with a new Ruben Studdard song behind it. “Celebrate Me Home”? What?

Here it is, guys — my sourdough starter project. It took a fortnight and some patience, but I’m finally ready to publish my results.

First off, I pimped my mixer. The “Classic White” was kind of boring, so I got some vinyl decals to make it more cool. A few hibiscus flowers make anything look better. (I initially wrote “hibiscus flours”, ha!) I firmly believe this will now make anything I bake a little more groovy.

I looked around online, and there were a ton of recipes and guides. But probably 80% of them included baker’s yeast in their initial recipe, and I wanted to avoid that — I wanted to make a starter out of just flour, water, and whatever wild yeasts Florida had to offer. Plus, many of the yeast-naysayers wrote that if you use commercial baker’s yeast, the proper bacteria won’t take hold, and it won’t be as sour as it could be.

The simplest recipes appealed to me — just flour and water. The type of flour varied, from regular all-purpose to specialty rye. If you’ve seen the price of rye flour, you’ll know why my starter is made with unbleached all-purpose flour. The first step is to mix the flour with some water — the temperature of the water should be warm, somewhere between 80 and 110 degrees. Just run the hot water tap until it feels like bathwater.

At first, I used a half-cup of flour and a half-cup of water. After the first week, I realized that I was using too much water, and started using less — a half-cup of flour combined with approximately 1/4 cup of warm water, blended to the consistency of pancake batter. You may need to add more or less water, depending on the flour you use or the humidity where you live. Some people advise against using metal utensils, but I had no problems using my old wire whisk. You could probably also use a wooden spoon or a rubber spatula, but the whisk was the fastest for me.

Day 1: I kept my starter on the kitchen counter, in a glass jar with the lid left ajar. This kept anything from falling into the starter, but allowed enough ventilation and access for the ambient yeast. (Side note: some starter sites claim that there’s no such thing as yeast in the air; that the yeast developed by a sourdough starter is already in the flour itself. Others claim it’s a combination, but that it takes much longer than a few days for “wild yeast” to find its way to your starter. Intriguing.)

You could use a ceramic crock, or a plastic jar — I went with clear glass because I could see everything that went on in there, and the glass jar was cheaper than the plastic when I was container-shopping. Most sites advised against using a metal container. At any rate, don’t seal the container — the yeast need to get in, and the gases they belch out need to escape.

For the first couple of days, nothing really happens with the starter. But feed it every day — pour out half of the starter, and add a new batch of batter. Every other day, I cleaned out the jar — this picture is from day 2, so there’s ick on the side of the jar from pouring out half.

Day 3: After a couple of days, the starter started to do things. But they weren’t the most attractive things. There was a foamy, bubbly layer on the top, with a layer of water, then a layer of batter. The smell wasn’t great, but it wasn’t rancid — kind of a cheesy odor. What’s going on here is this: other bacteria are noshing on the batter, but as they eat, they’re making the starter more and more acidic. Eventually, it gets so acidic that the “bad” bacteria can’t live there anymore. Then it’s time for Lactobacillus to move in, which is the bacteria that gives sourdough bread its sour flavor. It thrives in the acidic environment, while other unfriendly bacteria can’t handle it.

There are some starter recipes out there that use pineapple juice instead of water for the first few days, which gives the starter an acidic environment from the very beginning. But I didn’t do it for two reasons: one, I wanted to see what the starter did naturally; and two, I was vaguely unsettled by the idea of the pineapple juice. Can’t explain why.

Day 6: After around three days of foam, the starter stopped doing much. It still smelled vaguely cheesy, but there was no more foam, and no apparent activity. I kept feeding it every day. The excess water on the top let me know that I was using too much water in my feeding batter, so I poured off the excess water in the starter, and made my batter a little thicker. There were several notes on different online sites telling me to not get discouraged or worried at this point. The bad bacteria were dying off, having made the mix too acidic, and the good stuff was about to get started. A few days of dormancy were to be expected.

Days 7-10: Progress was slow, but every day, the batter had a few more bubbles in it. Keep feeding it every day. Around this time it stopped smelling so cheesy, and actually started to smell a little bit like sourdough bread. Smelling the starter is important; if at any time it smells rotten, it should be thrown away.

Day 11: The batter not only had a lot of bubbles in it, but also appeared to be increasing in volume. Awesome! On days 11 and 12, I made a mark on the side of the jar after I’d fed the starter, then I’d look and see how much it grew throughout the day. The starter is ready for baking when it doubles in volume after a feeding.

Day 13: The starter doubled on day 12, so I knew it was ready for baking. On day 13, I timed the starter to see how long it took to double in volume — that way, I’d know how long to wait before I could mix up some actual bread dough. This is the starter at 2-1/2 hours after feeding — you can see, it’s actually more than doubled. And you can also see the fabulous bubble action.

Day 14: We bake! Make sure you have some time on your hands — this is a great project for a day where you’re just puttering around the house. There’s a lot of checking on things and waiting involved. The first step is called “proofing the sponge”, wherein the sponge is the starter, and proofing is the act of making it double in volume. I moved the starter to a big bowl, then fed it with a full cup of flour and around a half-cup of water (as usual, making the consistency like a thick batter). I covered the bowl with plastic wrap with a few holes poked in it, so gases could escape but nothing icky could fall into the sponge. Here it is just after I fed it:

And here it is after 2-1/2 hours. Please note, it’s not actually a weird pinkish-orange color. I put it on the stovetop and turned on the light over the stove for a little warmth, and that’s just the color of that light. The starter itself is the same off-white as in the other pictures. The volume of sponge and active bubbles mean it’s ready to go. I actually let it go for three hours, and it rose a little bit more.

Baking: First off, I stirred the sponge a bit, to break down some of the bubbles. The texture when it’s at its peak is gummy and very sticky. I combined a couple of different recipes, and came up with the following:

2 C. sponge (Use a dry measuring cup, not a wet.)
2 Tbsp. olive oil (You could use melted butter here too, or omit the fat altogether.)
1 tsp. salt (Most recipes use more salt, but we’re a low-sodium household.)
4 tsp. sugar
3/4 cup water
3 C. flour (all-purpose works, as does bread flour. Your preference.)

You’ll have some sponge left over — feed it again with the usual mix, and put it back in your starter jar. Now you’re good to go for next time.

Throw everything but the flour into a bowl and start mixing. Add the flour 1/2 cup at a time until the dough pulls away from the sides of the bowl. (If you live in a humid area, you may need a little bit more flour.) You can take the dough out and knead it by hand, or if you have a tricked-out stand mixer, you can let it do the kneading for you.

When the dough is kneaded, put it in a bowl (I re-used the red bowl in which I proofed the sponge, after washing it) that’s been lightly oiled. Flip the dough ball over so that it’s oiled all over (this will keep it from drying and cracking) and cover the bowl with a damp kitchen towel. Put it in a warm place, 70-80 degrees, for a couple of hours. Once again, you’re waiting for it to double in size. It’ll probably take longer than a dough made with store-bought yeast.

Once it’s doubled, punch the dough down and knead it a little bit more. Now’s when you can divide the dough into whatever size and shape you want — you could do one huge loaf, or a couple of smaller loaves, or some rolls. Shape your loaves or rolls, and put them on a greased cookie sheet (I use silicon baking pads instead of greasing). Cover once again with the damp towel, and wait again for everything to double in size. This might not take as long — for me, it was about another hour and a half.

Once they’re ready, slash some cuts in the top of your loaves for expansion. Put the loaves in the oven, then turn the oven on to 350 degrees. Don’t pre-heat the oven. Bake for 25-45 minutes, depending on the size of the loaves/rolls you’re making. You’ll know they’re done when they’re not only golden-brown-delicious looking, but when you can flip them over and they sound hollow when you knock on the bottoms.

The bread made with this starter is heavy, chewy, dense, and very soft on the inside. The crust is great — not soft, but not a sharp hard crust either. The sourdough flavor is subtle, because this is a young starter — as the starter ages, the flavor will grow stronger. Some folks out there on the internets don’t believe a starter reaches its full flavor until it’s over a year old. The intensity of flavor may also vary due to where you live — out on the west coast, Lactobacillus sanfrancisco is a regional version that gives San Francisco sourdough its distintive tartness.

Now that the starter is healthy and ready for baking, I’ll be experimenting with different recipes. I could, if I wished, put it in the refrigerator and only feed it once a week to maintain it. But I’m going to keep it on the counter for at least a couple more weeks, to develop a stronger flavor.

Resources I used:
Sourdough Baking: The Basics, by S. John Ross
the rec.food.sourdough starter FAQ
Wild Yeast Sourdough Starter (this is the one with the pineapple juice)
howstuffworks: How Sourdough Bread Works

Boys and girls together? Fabulous!

With new opening credits, and a new set to boot! The stage itself isn’t that different, but we now have catwalks up on pillars like on So You Think You Can Dance, and the band is spread out up on a balcony. Seacrest points out a “mosh pit” in front of the judges. Does this mean contestants can no longer walk the ramp behind the judges?

At this moment, I must make an aside — Red Vines and American lager don’t go together. At all.

The doors at the back of the stage open slowly, revealing the top 12. The kids hesitate, then uncertainly make their way out. AWK-ward! Seacrest throws us to a package about tonight’s theme — the Lennon/McCartney songbook. Aw, yeah! The judges banter with Seacrest a bit, and it’s on to the performances.

Syesha Mercado: Seems like their packages this week will be a brief bio, or a history of how they came to love music, or maybe both. We’ll see. She’s doing “Got to Get You into My Life”. It starts out in a weird key — she’s singing too low, and hits a few dud notes. It doesn’t excite me, but that may be because it’s not the kind of Beatles music I like. The judges give their opinions, and it’s really weird to have people standing up in front of the judges, looking back at them. Simon really likes it, which is weird. But he points out that she looks nervous, which I’ll agree with.

Chikezie: An argyle sweater vest? Really? Dude, you’re no Blake Lewis. Seacrest does the sit-and-chat before the singing begins, blah blah blah. In his interview, he refers to searching people in his capacity as a TSA agent as “feeling people up”. He’ll be performing “She’s a Woman”, and he’ll be “putting my own funk on it.” Um, that sure doesn’t sound right. He sits on the edge of the stage with a banjo player, a violinist, and a tambourine dude. He starts with a real backwoodsy sound, and I’m sad to admit it’s not bad. The band kicks in, and Chikezie flails around like a headless chicken, but it’s … a fascinating performance. The judges love the crap out of it. Ugh, it was good! But I still don’t like him! I don’t want him to be good! He’s totally safe for the week.

Ramiele Malubay: She’s so damned cute, it makes me want to vomit rainbows. Her family is all cute too. She mentions loving “Yesterday” growing up, but that’s not what she’s doing tonight — she’s singing “In My Life”, which is a song I love. She starts standing on the stairs, looking up, which is kind of weird … but she’s totally on key and it’s lovely. Although I hoped that she’d speed it up, or put more gusto into it in the second half, and she doesn’t. Randy calls it kind of boring. Paula tells her how pretty she looks, then calls it a safe choice. Simon was bored to tears. Wow, the judges are harsh on her — and not a word about her great pitch.

Jason Castro: Please sing something beautiful, mister beautiful boy! In his interview, there are little bugs flying around his head, and I can’t help but think it’s related to his dreads. Please cut that hair, beautiful boy! He mentions loving “Yesterday” growing up, but he’s doing “If I Fell” tonight. He has the guitar again, and it’s a slow and drowsy performance. He has a great falsetto, but some of the other notes are questionable. Will the judges accuse him of being boring as well? Randy was so-so, Paula felt his heart, and Simon thought it was “very student in a bedroom at Midnight”. Egads, I love his analogies. Simon declares it good enough to stay another week, but not as good as last week. And the kid is still beautiful.

Carly Smithson: Carly gets the next session of sit-and-chat with Seacrest. With some loose waves to it, her hair looks much less limp and greasy. Yay! She tells us that all of the Idols moved to their apartments yesterday, and she’s rooming with Amanda. She frequently sings “Come Together” in an acoustic arrangement at the bar where she works. It usually “goes down a treat”, so hopefully we’ll like it. Not one of my favorite songs, and the lyrics really make no sense whatsoever. I’m reminded of Simon’s comments at the outset of the night, about easy songs versus challenging songs, and I think this is one of the easy ones. But the audience seems to love it, Randy loves it, Paula loves it, and Simon says she’s finally chosen the right song. He compares her to Kelly Clarkson, in the way she finally started to shine in the finals.

Commercials: Hell’s Kitchen is coming back! HUZZAH! I’ll take all the Gordon Ramsay I can get.

David Cook: We find out before the break that he’s doing “Eleanor Rigby” tonight. File this one under “Beatles songs I love”. He realizes that it’d be overkill to play his guitar tonight (yay) but still has that comb-forward hairdo (boo). His rendition is this odd rock-ish thing … I don’t love it, but it’s not awful. His singing is very good, almost completely on-key. And if he hadn’t been in the competition this year, Robbie may have seemed like an “authentic” rocker — but this kid is actually the genuine article. The judges shower their approval, with Simon calling it brilliant.

Item: it’s 9:53pm here on the east coast, and I can hear the booming of a fireworks show somewhere out on Disney property. Sounds like a big finale — my guess is it’s Illuminations over at Epcot. Damn hell ass, it’s cool to live here.

Brooke White: She loved the hell out of the Sgt. Pepper album … but she’ll be singing “Let It Be” tonight. She seems pleasant and likable in her package, like a surprising number of contestants this year. She performs while playing the piano, and while it’s not the best as far as just vocals, it’s a good all-around musical performance. And you can tell she’s genuinely emotionally into it. The judges agree that it was good, and that she has a knack for making emotional connections to the songs and to the audience — Simon gives it the word “believable”. The only weird thing is that her dress seems three sizes too big.

David Hernandez: He’s in college. His major was my major! He used to work at a pizza place! So far, he’s my young male bizarro twin. He’s doing “I Saw Her Standing There”, and oh yes, he’s on that platform back behind the judges. He seems to be trying to rock up the song, but he has such a boy-band voice, it doesn’t fit together. Randy agrees that it was weird. Paula agrees that it was weird. Simon rates it as “no, no, no”. Also, “corny verging on desperate” and “rabbit in the headlights”. Simon is in rare form with his witty comments tonight.

Amanda Overmyer: It’s time once again for sit-and-chat! We find out that she sits and thinks before her performances. She’s going to sing “You Can’t Do That”, a song she’d never heard before this week. Hmm. How is it that this kid has gone from looking 30 to looking 12 over the last few weeks? Anyhoo, she sings, and it’s better than the last couple of weeks. She still looks uncomfortable, but less so than in 70s and 80s weeks. This is a song I’m unfamiliar with, but it sounds like she’s mostly in tune. I don’t like her gently curled hair extensions — they stand out from her actual hair length in a really obvious way. Randy applauds that she took a Beatles song and made it something for a southern rock bar. Simon says it wasn’t as good as last week, and he only understood 30% of the words.

Commercials: Enchanted is coming out on video! Man, I loved that dorky little movie.

Michael Johns: The best part of his interview package is a shot of him and some other children, and he’s wearing a Vegemite sweatshirt. Aussie oy! Tonight he’ll be singing the newly repopularized “Across the Universe”, which is on the “faves” side of the Beatles catalog for me. I stopped typing and just listened and watched through the whole performance, which is rare — I thought it was very nice. Randy wants something bigger to have happened, and calls it a little sleepy. Paula disagrees, giving kudos to his quiet confidence. Simon breaks the tie and agrees with Randy — Michael should have done like “what’s the Irish girl’s name? Ah, Carly” did with her song, and changed it up some. I guess Simon and I just disagree when it comes to a well-delivered and heartfelt ballad.

Kristy Lee Cook: Please please please, don’t add that fake country twang to whatever you do. Oh noes, she’s going to take “Eight Days a Week” and change it into a country song. It sounds just wrong from the get-go … either she’s off the tempo horribly, or she’s changed it to 7/8 time or something really weird. And oddly, the music is playing really fast, but her singing is sluggish and boring. Randy’s on the fence about it. Paula didn’t enjoy it because she went TOO far with the whole “more country” thing. Simon calls it “horrendous”, calling it “Dolly Parton on helium”. NICE!

David Archuleta: The mere mention of his name makes the audience squeal. He’s doing “We Can Work It Out” because he’s familiar with the Stevie Wonder version. He’s terribly nervous, and forgets some of the lyrics in the first verse. And a word or two in the second. And he started to switch lines in the chorus, but the background singers jolted him back on track. Oh, the poor kid. Randy and Paula are kind, but Simon is honest and tells him it was a mess. I think he’ll stay around, because he has a strong fan base, but this was the biggest screwup of the night.

Recaps: Syesha was forgettable. Chikezie was a big spaz, but did well. Ramiele was … the judges were right, it’s boring. Jason was beautiful and bland. Carly was decent. David Cook rocked Eleanor Rigby’s lonely ass. Brooke was so emotional, even her recap makes me want to cry. David Hernandez was mediocrity personified. Amanda was better, but not great. Michael was lovely. Kristy did country as if she were on valium. David Archuleta gave his worst performance so far, but was still a cute little button.

My bottom three: Kristy, Syesha and David Hernandez … and I’m going with Kristy for elimination.

It’s the girls! Taking on the 80s! I’ll predict “Total Eclipse of the Heart” right now.

Seacrest introduces the judges, and it sounds like he says “Simon Bowels”. Ew. Oh, and he mentions that the 80s were big for Paula. Will anyone do a Paula song? We’ll see!

Asia’h Epperson: Oh, right, embarrassing moments. Hers is that she was roller-skating as an extra in a movie, and ran into the set. She starts “I Wanna Dance with Somebody” at the top of the stairs, wearing some pants with an incredibly high waist. Seems like she has the spirit of the 80s in her clothing as well as her singing. Her voice isn’t as break-filled as usual, but there’s still some of it in there. Overall it’s an unexciting performance of a crappy song. Randy finds it “hot”, Paula thinks she nailed it, Simon calls it “second-rate Whitney Houston”. He complains that she did the Whitney version of the Whitney song, which is 100% apt.

Kady Malloy: Our one remaining Blondezilla admits to an embarrassing trip and fall after a bad audition for a school talent show. She sings Queen’s “Who Wants to Live Forever”, and it starts out AWFULLY. I love this song, and she’s mauling it — she’s violently flat on all of the important notes. Oh, and she murders the end, which is usually haunting, by changing the notes to a sappier key. This is terrible, and she should have gone home. Randy tells her she hit the big notes well — what are you, HIGH, Randy? Paula calls it her best performance to date, which is terribly sad. Simon calls it better than last week, but hates her lack of personality. He compares her to a robot. But I imagine a robot wouldn’t SING FLAT.

Amanda Overmyer: Her moment is that she burned down her deck and pool. She’s singing “I Hate Myself for Loving You”, and while it’s better than last week, she still looks uncomfortable and like she wants to be anywhere but on that stage. The last two weeks, she’s lost all the spark and joy that she originally had. But at least her hair isn’t as scary as it was last week. I fear she’ll get criticized for the simplicity of the song — “not a singer’s song” and so forth. But Randy thinks she chose well, Paula agrees, and Simon calls it fantastic. Then he gets on her case for not smiling. Yeah, where has her personality gone? She’s more robotic than Kady!

Carly Smithson: On a break from work, she went to the bar next door and got her leg stuck in a railing. Her friend oiled and buttered her leg. HOT. But what I want to know is, why did I start out by writing her name as “Carly Hennessey”? Is that the name she used on that first album? Hmm. Anyhoo, she sings “I Drove All Night” while wearing pants even worse than Asia’h's — snug stretch jeans with a high waist and horrible button detailing. These pants make her look way chubbier than she actually is. The notes are all where they should be, but it’s a somewhat boring performance — she lacks Cyndi Lauper’s pizazz. Randy and Paula enjoyed it, but Simon says it wasn’t the right choice (because he thinks of the Celine Dion version). We get to see Carly’s adorable Irish mother, who doesn’t look old enough to have a daughter Carly’s age.

Kristy Lee Cook: Seacrest teases that she’s going to sing Journey, so we spend the time during her embarrassing moment guessing what she’ll sing. I’m leaning soft, like “Lights” but not — some other deep ballad that we’re forgetting about. Scott’s going with “Don’t Stop Believing”. Ah, it’s “Faithfully”, so I kind of win. She gives it a country twang, and shows us that she ate a red-tinted candy or a lozenge before singing — her tongue is slathered in FD&C Red #5. It’s all right, if a little bland, although the big notes at the end aren’t that great. I think she’s going to stay this week, because of the country fans. Randy and Paula like her, but Simon calls her “forgettable”. She reminds me of a phrase Scott uses for bland pretty girls — for being as pretty as she is, she’s as sexy as cottage cheese.

Ramiele Malubay: Her embarrassing moment is that … oh, it’s so ungodly boring, there’s no point in typing it out. She’s dressed the part for 80s night, and starts into “Against All Odds” all soft and dewy, then gets not quite as powerful as I hope in the chorus. I like it much better than most of what we’ve heard tonight, and she’s so damned cute to boot. Randy likes it, Paula babbles for a thousand years, and Simon thinks it’s old-fashioned, and he missed the big-money note. A mixed bag, but I’m pretty sure she’s safe this week. There’s a good point made about her confidence — if she can get it back, she’ll go quite far.

Brooke White: Seacrest teases before the break that she’ll be doing “Love is a Battlefield”, and my immediate response is, “OH, awesome.” I like this girl, I like this song, I sure hope she doesn’t screw it up. Her moment of shame is that she grabbed the wrong dude after church, thinking it was her dad. She starts out sitting on the edge of the stage, singing to a solo strummed guitar. Whoa, the whole thing is just accompanied by a guitar, and it’s a GREAT re-arrangement. I love this. Randy likes it, then points out that Paula choreographed the video. WHAT WHAT? The flashy angry hooker dance was from Paula? OMG! Paula wishes she’d used the band more, but Simon agrees with me — she changed it up in a great way.

Syesha Mercado: Her most embarrassing moment includes a “Do you like me, Y/N” note. She also went to the same pants-merchant as Carly and Asia’h — same high waist and button details, although hers are shorts. She’s tackling “Saving All My Love for You” and does all right with it, although it’s a copy of the Whitney Houston version — nothing terribly new. She doesn’t hit any real dud notes, but it’s not exciting. Girl has legs for miles, that’s for sure. Randy just says “good” twice, Paula calls it sophisticated, and Simon calls it good as well. Clearly they’re short as hell on time.

Recap time! Asia’h was uneventful. Kady mangled Queen, Amanda improved but looked scared, Carly did well but was bland, Kristy was country cottage cheese, Ramiele was adorable, Brooke was awesome, and then my recording ended. I didn’t get a recap of Syesha, but that’s all right.

For this week, I have to vote Kady again, because she needs to get gone. I’m also going to go with Kristy, who’s more boring than the other boring girls.